Tales from the Day Job
Ok, first- a moment of silent sympathy please. (Pause for silence) I have... Poison Ivy...on my FACE. ACK! My eyelids! Inside my ear!
Ugh! Luckily I caught onto it pretty quick, usually I scratch and scratch thinking it is only a mosquito bite. So now I'm coated in clear gel. It is hardened on my face like a mask. I do have a nice botox like serenity to my face, as well as a healthy shine (gel tends to be shiny). But alas, it also tend to peel and flake making it look like I'm shedding. Skin. Ack! I'm supposed to look semi-presentable in one week for nationals. Which is probably the only thing keeping from cashing in a few sick days and clawing the heck out my face.
In other work news, today was a potluck lunch day. Now, I'm no Martha Stewart, but somehow I'm of the mind that if you are bringing food to a potluck, you will be judged on it. And so it better be your best stuff (or at least stuff that no one can fault you on, like the Fritos I brought once). But I guess these ladies use the potluck to clean out their fridge, 'cuz seriously the spread always looks more like leftovers at my Grandmother's house. And even the ones who make an attempt don't do it justice. A green bean casserole should not, I repeat not, taste like freezer.
So, like I said I really can't judge or cook, but people can't seem to figure my food offerings out. For the Brunch potluck I brought a seasonal fave: Clementines with a great little fruit dip. People were frightened by my mutant oranges. They didn't know how to use the fruit dip- do we dip it? Do we dribble it? Oh, we peel these?
And today was no different. I brought a salsa medley dip (basically it has black beans, shoe peg corn, bell pepper, celery, tomatoes, olives, salsa and salad dressing) and chips (Tostitos Scoops -hint hint). Is it a salad? Do we dip it? Can I put it on a Trisket?
Oh, and then my dyslexic typing method sent out a link to what was supposed to be PRONET, but tragically went out as PORNET. Not good.
Ugh! Luckily I caught onto it pretty quick, usually I scratch and scratch thinking it is only a mosquito bite. So now I'm coated in clear gel. It is hardened on my face like a mask. I do have a nice botox like serenity to my face, as well as a healthy shine (gel tends to be shiny). But alas, it also tend to peel and flake making it look like I'm shedding. Skin. Ack! I'm supposed to look semi-presentable in one week for nationals. Which is probably the only thing keeping from cashing in a few sick days and clawing the heck out my face.
In other work news, today was a potluck lunch day. Now, I'm no Martha Stewart, but somehow I'm of the mind that if you are bringing food to a potluck, you will be judged on it. And so it better be your best stuff (or at least stuff that no one can fault you on, like the Fritos I brought once). But I guess these ladies use the potluck to clean out their fridge, 'cuz seriously the spread always looks more like leftovers at my Grandmother's house. And even the ones who make an attempt don't do it justice. A green bean casserole should not, I repeat not, taste like freezer.
So, like I said I really can't judge or cook, but people can't seem to figure my food offerings out. For the Brunch potluck I brought a seasonal fave: Clementines with a great little fruit dip. People were frightened by my mutant oranges. They didn't know how to use the fruit dip- do we dip it? Do we dribble it? Oh, we peel these?
And today was no different. I brought a salsa medley dip (basically it has black beans, shoe peg corn, bell pepper, celery, tomatoes, olives, salsa and salad dressing) and chips (Tostitos Scoops -hint hint). Is it a salad? Do we dip it? Can I put it on a Trisket?
Oh, and then my dyslexic typing method sent out a link to what was supposed to be PRONET, but tragically went out as PORNET. Not good.
posted by wilddunz at 1:27 PM
1 Comments:
LMAO!!! It's a sad world when people don't know how to eat.
When typing... remember, backspace is your friend. :) hehe (It's my best friend!)
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